Die Welle

I'm going to bed. I'm still tired as hell. It didn't pass, not that I thought it would.

And I forgot to mention that we saw Die Welle today. I've been wanting to see it for a long time and I've tried to. But I've been unsuccessful. So I'm really glad I got to see it and it was pretty good. I guess we'll have a class discussion about it, and that's not too fun but I got to see the movie =D


I'm home from school. Just made a cake, but it was a bit weird so I'm not sure how it turns out when it comes out of the oven. And I burned my mothers cake that she made the other day, cause she had it in the oven and I didn't remember so when I turned the oven on her cake started baking again, of course. But I think it's not too much.

I am so tired! I want to sleep.

And by the way, did you know that Angel is a spin-off from Buffy the Vampire Slayer? I didn't, but I saw like two minutes of a Buffy show and I knew that David Boreanaz was in it, but he was called Angel so... Hehe. I have to tell my sister, I wonder if she knows?


I don't know why I'm so freaking tired! Went to bed super early and I have for the last few days. I guess I don't sleep very well, that it doesn't give me any rest...

But who cares? Let's all go to school and be even more energy drained, cause school is the most important thing! Ehm?


I just watched an episode of Charmed. It was an old one, with Prue. Brings back some memories all right.


And since I can't go to Tunisia during my break I at least want to go here. But I'm doubtful if I can or no...


I got a text from A today, saying they waiting for me to come back. And it brakes my heart saying I can't. I didn't say that, I just said I want back too. It just makes me realize there's more people involved in this. Not just me.

I've never felt like this before. It's just a big weight on my shoulders, and everything keeps reminding me of it.

Money isn't everything, but it sure is a lot.


I'm back from school. I had fifteen minutes of class and then we tried out our hats for the graduation. So it was ok.

trying to plan my future ^^

I know I posted for less than a minute ago, but I just thought I'd tell you that only one flying company (?) flies to Tunisia in December. And it's not cheap, which I thought it would be. So I'm upset. Maybe I can only stay one week then too...

bye for now

After doing absolutely nothing since I woke up around eight I'm going to school soon. But it's just for an hour so it can't be that bad, right? (trying to be positive, if you haven't noticed)


Since I don't start until 12:55 today I took the time to make myself a nice breakfast. The only thing missing was some juice.


that's all I'm saying


Guess what happened this morning? I overslept! I never do that! I guess I was too tired. And I had a hard time sleeping cause my back was killing me last night. I tried to "crack it away" and I did succeed, but it took me a while. I had set the alarm and it did ring maybe three times when I thought: I'm awake. And turned it off. But obviously, I wasn't awake. So I had to rush out of bed and my mum helped me get the breakfast ready. It made me think of hotel breakfasts. And it made me miss them. And thinking of hotels... No, let's stay positive.

Idol soon!


I've done a very careful check of my economy. I have to pay this stupid bill but I don't have the money to. My mother owe me some money, so I don't owe her as much as I thought, but neither one of us physically have the money so it's hard... But it'll work out. I just miss my baby so much, and I want to go to him <3


And I wonder why I for days have had this disgusting taste of beer in my mouth. Beer mixed with chocolate. I've only had that mix once, and it was a long time ago now. Whywhywhywhy? I don't want it, it makes me wanna throw up. yuck


I feel sick. So I'm just going to take a shower and go to bed. Good night

sushi, where art thou?

We've been searching the whole village for some sushi. There is none! So I had to go with plan B for dinner, pommes frites and meat balls.


I wonder where my family is. I don't mind being allone but I'm just wondering. I though they'd be back by now...

want one. hehe

Isn't it pretty nice? But I think I want mine to be less detailed...


I finished all the paper work in one hour and thirty minutes. So I estimated pretty good. And I'm so hungry!!!! So now I'm making lunch.

Oh shoot, I burned it.


What the hell is wrong with the sound on my computer? I can't watch any videos or anything... =´(

good morning

I'm eating breakfast now. And when I finish I think I'm going to the work that's left. And after that, well... I don't know. I would like to go to the golf course but there's a competition there today that I do have to be in but I told someone I had other plans. So now I can't go there to practice. That wouldn't be right. =(

But I can always study...

good old days

I just read through the assignment I wrote after finishing Doktor Glas two years ago. It was a time when I still were doing good at school. Haha. What happened to me?

good day

The movie is finished. It was pretty good.

I feel like I've done a lot today. I've cleaned, I've practiced, I've worked, I've watched a movie, I've made my bed and so on. Very effective. What I haven't done is studied. But there's a day tomorrow too, right?

Män som hatar kvinnor

I'll soon be watching "Män som hatar kvinnor" with my parents. I haven't read the book, but both the book and movie is supposedly good so I have big hopes. It's 146 minutes long, so I guess it'll take a while ^^. But no worries, I have soda, tea, chips and cake to make it through. haha, I'm just kidding.

Lonely People

Listening to the song by Jars of Clay. It's nice.

Did the work, but my mother just informed me that I missed some papers that were hidden in a plastic bad ^^ But I'll just do them tomorrow. It didn't take at all as long as I thought it would. The bunch that I actually did took me almost two hours, so it wasn't bad at all. And it's not a lot paper left, maybe an hour. So that's three hours to get paid for! Woho!


I started my day with some cleaning. Now I'm going to the golf course to practice for a little while. And when I get back I have an afternoon full of work to look forward to. And it's not such a bad thing, really. Sure, it's boring as hell. But if you are in desperate need of money it's a good thing.


And I are going to study a little bit before we watch Criminal Minds. I missed Idol today, but it's okay, I'll just watch the rerun (is that what you call it?). But I am actually going to do some math. Right now. On a friday night! Aren't I diligent?

sorry mama

We drove J to the bus station and then my mother had some things to do in Centrum. And we happened to run in to A, and of course I stayed with her talking. But I stayed a bit too long. So now my mother is mad at me cause I kept her waiting. And I understand her and I'm upset with my self. As usual, then ;)

Have a great friday night to all of you! I know I will. I'll make sure I do.


Sitting in my bed with J. We got home, made som cola in the Soda Streamer and then we made a chocolate cake. And then we saw the movie 27 dresses, with really low sound and the color disappeared sometimes but it ignored J more than it ignored me... Now I'm going to be social, so see you later!


I've moved from my room to the kitchen to the living room, making my current location the living room. Meaning in front of the TV. Doing two bad things at once. Make it three considering what I eat.

Okay, too much information. Sorry!


I'm home. My teacher let me skip German class and just read my book at home. Very generous. So I guess I'll read a bit later. But now I'm too tired.

We'll see if I have the energy to make dinner today. Maybe some fries?


In school. Stole J's computer. It's so tiny I can't even write on it! I get that it's smart an all that, but to have just this? No, I couldn't do it. I like my computer. I'll write again when I'm back home. Bye!

sweet dreams

Good night everybody! I'm insanely tired and I have nothing to do so I might as well go to bed. See you all tomorrow.


I didn't eat any dinner yesterday, so today I thought I'd actually make something. And it's way earlier than I usually eat but I don't care. It was nice.

The result - some sort of a taco mix.

good morning every one

I am at home. First I had a driving lesson, and I was going to go to school when I noticed it was actually two hours until I start and that I could spend the time at home instead, which was a very good idea, if I might say so my self. I'm not sure if I have the energy to study right now, but you can't be good every day, can you?

Anyway, the driving lesson went well for a change. So drivers license - here I come! (I'm just kidding, I have a long way to go before that.. but still!)

So, take care on this beautiful September day and remember to put on a smile =)


I'm watching Idol. It's the final auditions, which is a lot more fun to watch than the first auditions. Cause now it's only good people left. Although I think we got to see a lot more good people than bad this year compared to previous already in the first auditions.

Well, well. Better get back to the TV before it starts again.


It feels very lonely. No one is home except me and the animals. Very weird. For so long all I wanted was to be alone at home, and it's nice. But it's also quite boring. Nothing to do, you know...

puppies and japanese number games

My aunt and my cousin just came by, my mother had apparently asked my cousin do help us do something with the computer. But the good part is that they brought the puppy. It was nice to see the little one again, she's so cute.

And I'm tryng to solve this Sudoku, but it seems to be impossible! And I consider myself good at this game... I'm devastated. No, I'm just kidding. I'll keep struggleing, hehe.


I've just been out pumping air into the tires of my bike. So hopefully it wont be quite so hard going to school today. Which I am in a few minutes, so we'll see. At least I gave it an honest try. A for effort, right?


My father just got back home from Scotland. He left last Wednesday. That's why me and my mum have been all allone this weekend.


I'm just not in the mood today.

sunday bloody sunday

A nice weekend has come to an end. Me and my mum has really taken the time to be with each other, which is nice for a change. The last... year, I might say... hasn't really had any time for that. Mostly she've been working and I've been practicing and then we've just been fighting. So it's been nice. I bet I've gained some weight though, considering the large amount of food and sweets I've been eating. I don't really care about it because of health or eating disorder thoughts, but my stomache really hurts!!!

Hehe, well. Today we had pizza for dinner. And now, at 21:42, I'm going to bed. I'm really tired and I'm glad I don't have practice in the morning. Okay, I do,  but without a trainer so I'm skipping that. Sorry!

(and I have the funniest joke to the headline, so feel free to ask. but it's not funny if you haven't heard the song)


I'm heading off to the golf course in a few minutes. And when I get back, I have some studying to do. Yippie! Or not...


My mum and I really are having some "bonding" time being all allone. It looks nice like this, before. But it really hurt my stomache afterwards...

And then I wonder why it is I always upload pictures of what I eat?


And I found a very nice pair of ribbed socks to go along with this nice autumn day. I think it's my dad's old football socks, but who cares?

Very cozy =)

it's a nice day

It really was a beautiful day, and I was happy. But then she had to comment on my amount of practice this year and I'm just so tired of it. She doesn't get it, at all.  She never gets it, and it agitates me a lot. But it's still a very nice day, a bit cold though. So let's just enjoy it, shall we?

The picture is not from today, but it was a nice one that I had in the archive so...


Saturday, and I got to sleep for as long as I wanted! Luxury =)

My mum and I are taking a drive in a while. We're going to the store I think, but mostly it's cause I need to practice driving a little. And I need to start study some theory soon!


Blog Awards

I have now voted for "blog of the year" in Blog Awards 2009. Of course I voted for Kenza, who's blog really is the best.

Vote for me! (=P)

here you go

As promised: It's friday, but maybe I said that this morning? Anyway, I'm making soup for me and my mum tonight, and then we're going to watch a movie. But I must say I'd like to see Idol first... I hope she's allright with that.

Since I came home from school I've been doing some cleaning. I've vaccum cleaned the all the first floor and the stairs and I cleaned the bathroom sink. And also the kitchen, which no one has done in a while so it was good.

Two times today, I'm getting better, eh?

trying to be good again =P

It's morning, and while no one's home and I have some spare time before I have to go to school I thought I'd update a little bit better again. It took me forever to decide what to wear this morning, sometimes you just have those days, right? And it's so cold and I think it'll be freezing in what I eventually chose but who care? Better than nothing, I guess.

Yesterday me, my sister and our mum sat down watching Criminal Minds and ate some ice cream with Cocoa Wafer sticks. It was nice, but after a while I fell asleep. And no one ever lets me sleep! I don't know why. I mean, when my father sleeps we wake him up, but that's because he's snoring. And I was not snoring! So I missed the end...

I will write tonight, this is a promise!

good bye and good luck

I am so sorry. Hope you can forgive me - I'm going to blame this internet situation of mine. It's simply not as easy when you don't have internet access all the time. 

Anyway, I'm a little sad, cause my sister is moving tomorrow!!! To England, so I won't be seeing her until Christmas. It's going to be weird. I've often dreamed about this day, being allone with my parents. But I am a little sad, to my big surprise.


Autumn. Time for shopping. For those who don't owe a lot of money. For those who don't go to Tunisia.

I just really want to buy shoes and cardigans, and a pair of jeans and hats, and scarfs and all! All of those nice things that makes the autumn such a great season. And I walked past the shoe store on my way to school (I'd been at the doctor's) and I saw the nicest boots! I want them! But I can't have it... Stupid everything.

Hehe, cheer up. I put my self in this situation, so I just have to deal with it.

My hectic way

It's 02:17 and I'm up. It's not so unsual. I go to sleep around ten, and then I wake up at one or two and then I go back to bed after about an hour or so... I'm super duper tired. But I traded my nice morning towards a golf lesson and a visit do the doctor.

So good bye sleeping! =(


I don't know why but I can't stop eating! So maybe it's a good thing going to practice. First of all it'll stop me from eating, and second it's a little exercise to work it off. Only a small one, but still!


I don't feel like going to practise today, when do I ever? But I have to. I have to do so many things. It all sucks so bad.



I'm trying so hard to find a job! But either they don't want me or they don't answer the freaking phone. Stupid...


finally some pics...

Okay, still super duper bad updating. But! I am now showing you a photo of some of the mushrooms I were out picking with my mother this friday! And today I got to meet the puppy. Very cute.

What do you think? Pretty nice, huh?

more photos?

So I promised you to upload some pictures, which I didn't. I have to get better at that... Sorry

better improve again

Lousy update again, I'm sorry! But there haven't been much to write, and with internet being this stupid I'm not using my computer as much. Really, it's very tiring when internet isn't working.

Later today I will upload some pictures of something we did yesterday. Don't you get extremely curious? =P
But I haven't got my camera with me right now, so I can't do it now.




Late night snack - I will at least try to study a bit =)

french fries and Idol

I'm just waiting for the time to pass so that I can make my fries and watch Idol. It's going to be so nice. Hopefully. A nice end to a horrible day. I'm not looking forward to tomorrows lesson, I can tell you that much.

I'm sorry!!!

This day sucks. First of all I'm upset because of the whole money thing. And on top of that my friends are mad at me. I don't blame them cause I must be a real pain in the ass right now. But I don't want them to be and I definately don't want to hurt them in any way.

I feel like I'm constantly apolgizing to them, and now that I really have to give a proper apologize I don't know how to. Cause I want to make it really count, you know..


I'm sitting in the kitchen, the plan was to study. I have this Swedish thing due today, but I don't even know what to write yet. I just don't have any idea what so ever. I don't know what's happened to me... And time is ticking. If I don't come up with something, what will I do? HELP ME!!!!


My cousins are getting the puppy on Saturday which means I get to visit it on Sunday. Nice :) I keep trying to convince my mother that we should have puppies with our dog, but she says no. I know she wants to so I think I'll be able to win this one. Hehe. Wouldn't it be nice? Having all those small little puppies crawling around? Naw, I want them now <3



I feel sick. I could throw up any minute if I just allowed myself to. I got my phone bill.

sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeep... please?

Just a few minutes until departure. Mostly I just want to lie in my bed with the soft bed sheets and never get up. I haven't gotten to sleep for as long as I want in a long time. I want to sleep! It shouldn't be so hard but it is, unfortunately... But if I play bad enough tomorrow I don't have to get up so early on sunday =). I'm thinking and hoping, but of course I'll do my best anyway! OF COURSE!

competition... again!

First thing in the morning I'm going away. I don't really want to, but hey. The things you do for everyone else... Really it's not for me at all. But I'm trying. A for effort, right?

shower and soup

I just got out of a hot, long, nice shower. So my hair is clean, I smell good and most of all I feel good. I will top it with some soup and oven baked sandwich. Nice =)

i can't take it anymore

When do I ever get to relaxe? I'm so tired of being chronicly tired. =´( 

move out

I am so over living here. I just want to move out, get my own place and decorate it exactly as I want it. I have it all in my head, so clearly it makes me very irritated that I can't have it right now. The only thing I don't have clear in my mind is the kitchen. I know a few things, but I don't have this exact image like I have in the other rooms. Oh, I want it now...


I'm addicted to soda. Seriously. It's mad. I'm craving for soda and for pizza and it's not funny! And once I start I can't stop. I think I'll give in for my need of soda, but the pizza thing... What to do?


I'm finally home and it's 19:34. Today I went to Täby Centrum with A, J and M. I didn't buy anything, I was just holding them company (hrm?). Afterwards I went to the naprapath (how do you spell it?) and he cracked my neck, which is horrible, and gave me some massage. But now I don't have to see him for a while. I have felt really good after these meetings, but I guess they are expensive so...

(I looked up naprapath a while ago and it's supposed to be a word like that, but word doesn't know how to spell it so I'm not so sure anymore...?)

long breakfast

Today I don't start until 10.55. Isn't it great? Ok, I'd rather start at eight and finish by two but anyway! So now I have a lot of time and I'm going to spend it eating a long and nice breakfast. The usual cerials and my home made bread. Can it get better?


I'm off to practice soon. I'm going over to S's to go with her. But I have a problem. I can't find my shirt! I have no idea where it is. I've gone through all my drawers, all of my shelfs in the closet (I still don't have my own closet ^^). But I can't find it! It sucks. I really want it. I'm not usually this messy. I hope it turns up soon, cause I want it (if you missed that first five times I said that =P)


Tomorrow I start at 9:25. On Wednesday I star 10:55. I feel so lucky! I haven't had this luxury for two years now! And not before that either, come to think of it... So I'm very happy. And I have my tea and internet is back in action, although a bit slow. But hey, I'm happy. I'm happy I'm happy I'm happy I'm happy. (just thought I'd make a big deal out of it while I am, for once ^^)

(and my guidance councilor decided to take some time off. Who the hell does that in the beginning of the semester? That's insane, I need to talk to her!!)

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